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Ramayana by Bill Gates...
When Bill Gates was in India, he had a
chance 2 listen Ramayana from Vajpayee. After returning 2 US he wrote
it in his personal Diary which has been recently found (courtesy PTI).
These are excerpts from his diary:
Ramayana by Bill Gates...
LAN, LAN ago, in the SYSTEM of I/O-dhya, there ruled a PROCESSOR named
DOS-rat. Once he EXECUTED a great sacrifice PROGRAM after which his
queens gave an OUTPUT of four SUNs - RAM, LSIman, BUG-rat and
SED-rughana.
RAM the eldest was a MICROCHIP with excellent MEMORY. His brothers,
however, were only PERIPHERAL ICs. Once when RAM was only 16MB, he
married princess C ta.
12years passed and DOS-rat decided to INSTALL RAM as his
successor.However,Queen CIE/CAE(Kayegayee), who was once offered a boon
by DOS-rat for a lifesaving HELP COMMAND, took this opportunity at the
instigation of her BIOSed maid and insisted that her son Bug-rat be
INSTALLED and that RAM be CUT-N-PASTED to the forest for 14 years. At
this cruel and unexpected demand, a SURGE passed through DOS-rat and he
CRASHED like unstable version of AI MSN does in intel.
RAM agreed to LOG INTO forest and C ta insisted to LOGIN with him.
LSI-man also resolved on LOGGING IN with his brother. The forest was the
dwelling of SPARCnakha, the TRAN-SISTOR of RAW-van, PROCESSOR of LAN-ka.
Attracted by RAM, she proposed that he should marry her. RAM, politely
declined, perceiving C ta to be his SOURCE CODE. She hastened to kill
her but LSI-man cut her inportant PERIPHERALS. Weeping, SPARC-nakha fled
to LAN-ka, where RAW-van, moved by TRAN-SIS TOR s plight, approached his
uncle MAR-icha. MAR-icha REPROGRAMED himself to form a golden stag and
drew RAM deep into the forest. Finally, RAM shot the deer, which, with
his last breath, cried out for LSI-man in voice of RAM s SOUND CARD.
Fooled by this VIRTUAL RAM SOUND, C ta urged LSI-man to his brother s
aid. Catching the opportunity, RAW-van DELINKED C ta from her LIBRARY
and changed her ROOT DIRECTORY to LAN-ka.
------------------------INTERVAL-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
RAM and LSI-man started SEARCHING for the missing C ta all over the
forest. They made friendship with
the forest SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR Akshat sorry... SU-greev and his
powerful co-processor Ha-NEUMAN. who agreed to help RAM. SU-greev
ordered his PROGRAMMERS to use powerful SEARCH techniques learnt in
CS130 to FIND the missing C ta. His PROGRAMMERS SEARCHED allaround the
INTER-NETworked forests. Many tried to EXCITE the birds and animals not
to forget the WEBCRAWLERS (Insects) and tried to INFOSEEK something
about C ta. Some of them even shouted YAA-HOO but they all ended up with
NO FOUND MESSAGES Google, Lycos nothing was left untouched. The only
thing they forgot was to mail iitcse01 & get PTI s help. Ha-NEUMAN then
devised a RISCy TECHNOLOGY and used it to cross the seas at an
astonishing CLOCK SPEED. Soon Ha-NEUMAN DOWNLOADED himself into LAN-ka.
Ha-NEUMAN
found C ta under a brown - green (as Brahma will call it) TREE STRUCTURE
Ha-NEUMAN used the LOGIN ID (ring) to identify himself to C ta. After
DECRYPTING THE KEY, C ta asked him to send STATUS_OK MESSAGE to RAM.
Meanwhile all raakshasa BUGS around C ta captured Ha-NEUMAN to DELETE
him using everything including
Ctrl-Alt-Del. But Ha-NEUMAN spread chaos by spreading VIRUS Fire . Ha-NEUMAN
pressed ESCAPE from LAN-kaand & conveyed all the STATUS MESSAGES to RAM
and SU-greev. RAW-wan decided to take RAM head-on. One of the RAW-wan s
SUN almost DELETED LSI-man with a Brahma -astra. But Ha-NEUMAN resorted
to some ACTIVE-Xgradients and REFORMATTED LSI-man. RAM used the SOURCE
CODE secrets of RAW-wan and wiped out RAW-wan s presence on earth.
Later, RAM got INSTALLED in I/O-dhya and spreaded his USER FRIENDLY
PROGRAMS to all USERS and everyone lived happily ever after, playing &
enjoying AOE.